Pain and discomfort create change in our lives. Don’t let anyone sell you a book, a “free” webinar or any product that promises, declares, or even suggests that change will occur after you read, attend and pay your hard-earned money to purchase them.
While purveyors of products-as-change agents float around the Universe and the internet “visioning”, “co-creating”, “allowing”, “attracting” and “embracing”, you’ll be tempted to jump in with both feet because you want to believe that they hold the answers to your pain and struggle. After all, they sound so much more peaceful, centered, in harmony, “blissed” and blessed than you feel at the moment. Why? Because you just lost your job, moved across the country with your fifth grader to single parent him while you struggle to find work. Maybe you have a job and though the sign in front of the building doesn’t say “Morgue”, that’s how it feels to you every morning.
The search for meaning, worth and even a slice of something creative comes with you every day, tucked gently inside your hope. By noon you know what powerless feels like. You’d like to turn in your restroom key, to hell with the gold watch or even the pension. You’ll settle for an hour of joy and some body memories of how you used to smile more.
And then the real reason we don’t change things comes alone. Sounds like this…
“I can’t do that!”, “I need the health insurance.”, “This really isn’t that bad.”, “I only have ten more years before I am vested.”, “Oh my God, quit my job?!”. And even if you were to shush these voices, like a battalion of Civil War soldiers marching across the open fields, more and more voices in your chorus await with, “Who do you think you are?”, “This was good enough for your father, and it is good enough for you.”, “Work is hard, so what do you expect?”. One line after the other moves toward that big courageous you, the one that just read the latest book on How to:
1. find your soulmate
2. find a career after 60
3. find happiness after cancer
4. make love after 70
The fact is that fear is what must be moved before we can act. And what gets us unstuck when we are mired in fear of moving forward? There must either be so much pain in where we are currently…more pain than fear…or we must really believe we will die if we stay stuck where we are, not literally but death to our Soul. What finally creates the impetus to change our lives? Stay tuned…