She’s just turned five and is the less outgoing of the twins. Katie reminds me of myself in lots of ways. She’s athletic, prefers jeans to dresses, and has so many stories in her imaginative little head that at days end, she’s traveled the universe.
Last weekend, lucky me spent the afternoon with both the girls and their sweet Papa. We began with our ritual…tea with Grammie using real china cups and I might add, some pretty primo tea. I wanna raise ’em right! Then, a little artwork before we headed down to the nearby neighborhood field for our very first family baseball game. And, as luck would have it, we had the whole field to ourselves! It didn’t take but a few misses before both the girls got that baseball hitting “bug”. The feel of smacking a tennis ball with an over-sized bat was addictive, so their Papa and I got plenty of exercise in the outfield, and they were hoarse from screaming with joy. It was Heaven for this Grammie.
After some hot chocolate and dancing to a street band near where I live, we headed back home. Kate hadn’t put the bat down and had created stories for its use, appointing herself the “owner” of that bat. Sarah lagged behind, her little lower lip now telling me something was up. Falling back to be with her, I asked her about the lip and she said, “I’m sad because I don’t want to go home.” By the time we opened my front door, Kate too had alligator tears just waiting to roll down her face.
“I’m gonna miss you, Grammie”, she volunteered. Almost crying myself, I squatted beside both of them. “Grammie is going to miss you too.”
“Do you love me, Grammie?” Katie asked me and caught me quite by surprise. Almost choking from my heart breaking, I said, “Of course I do. More than the moon”. Then, this little 5 year old said something that sums up real love…”I know. When you really love somebody, you really miss them when they’re gone.” Holding back tears, I shook my head, knowing the wisdom and the pain she felt.
Part of loving is the inevitability of losing it at some point in the journey. And, whether it’s our grandchildren, our life partner or even when we are thinking about loving again after we’ve lost someone through death or divorce…we must embrace the bittersweet with the ecstasy of loving.
If you’re ready to risk loving again, I would love to walk beside you and guide you to that special someone with whom you can share this amazing chapter of your life.
Donna Bailey, MS
Coach, Speaker, Writer and Expert in Dating and Relationships for Grown-ups
Donna’s Big RED Chair