Years ago I was in my therapist’s office dreading the oncoming Day From Hell. It wasn’t surgery nor was I losing my job. It was that damned Valentine’s Day and I was once again, loveless in Seattle. OK, Maine…but it was winter!.
Handing me a box of Kleenex to get rid of raccoon eyes from sobbing, it was as if she wanted to finish me off. “You know, Donna, you have to love yourself. No man can give you what you want. Only you can give that to yourself.” I was livid! Having spent my childhood taking care of siblings and parents, I was tired of loving myself. I wanted the Prince, the horse, the slipper, the castle and no responsibility for anything. I wanted to be taken care of for once, and actually…forever.
How many of us still long for that? I am embarrassed to admit it, but there is always a part of me that hopes he will arrive tomorrow or at least before this Valentine’s Day. Swept up, astride a horse, riding off into the sunset, the Baja, the Bahamas…heck, I would settle for Napa Valley and a weekend in the hot springs.
This year, no Prince. And, thank God I still believe in love even when this trumped up holiday draws a line in the sand for the “haves” and the “have-nots”. That therapist gave me the one vital piece to the puzzle in how to enjoy my life. When I am not in the arms of a man I love, I wrap my arms around my sweet self. I invite those I love to join me for a slumber party, a chick flick and a great bottle of wine. I don’t need a prince to feel the love. It is all around me.